- chivas - tastes like wood soaked in motor oil
- dewars - tastes like wood soaked in motor oil
- cutty sark - see above
- jb - just don't.
- knob creek - tastes like wood soaked in fire
- makers mark - tastes like wood soaked in charcoal
- buffalo trace - tastes like wood soaked in charcoal with pepper and fire - it bites you back
- jameson - tastes like what i believe an irish person soaked in a cheap barrel would taste like
- crown royal - tastes like what i believe a canadian soaked in a cheap barrel would taste like
- crown royal special reserve - this is just way too smooth. i mean really.
- a really old midleton - wow. ridiculous. this is just, not fair to anyone.
- tullamore dew - you might as well just drink jameson
- bushmills - see above
- jim beam black - this guy's your buddy. invite him in. maybe have a sleepover.
- jim beam white - only if you're in a pinch
- jim beam green - don't bother
- woodford reserve - a step above maker's mark. i highly recommend it.
- gentleman jack - not so much
- jack daniel black - whatever
- jack single barrel - mah
- johnny walker anything - takes me right back to the first few on this list. something to do with motor oil comes to mind.
- basil hayden's - i can't speak ill of this. for some obvious reasons that are only obvious to some.
- black velvet - ugh. please don't. but if you even try to put diet sprite in this for me, i'll chop your hand off.
- macallen's - this can be a pretty easy one to take. "can be."
- glenlivet/glenfiddich - "scotch". you really have to like scotch.
if anyone disagrees with my findings, you're wrong. ok bye.