while i'm not working for the man, i will be enjoying my life for a change. i was just thinking of activities for a suitable agenda and luckily, i was able to throw some things together. have a look at what i'm thinking thus far:
some time after 7am - awaken
some time after i awaken -drink delicious coffee
some time after drinking delicious coffee - dress in suitable clothing
some time after dressing in suitable clothing - drive to gc for some number of holes (golf. what other kind would i be trying to drive into)
some time after suitable amount of hole driving - return home and lose 90% of clothing, text boy toy
some time after losing clothing - lay poolside with pre-made margarita jug
some time after being kicked out of neighborhood pool - return home for nap
some time after waking from nap - play ddr in my kitchen and kick its ass
some time after kicking ddr's ass - conduct 80s dance party in aforementioned kitchen
some time after bitchin 80s dance party - pass out on cold kitchen floor
some time after kitchen floor pass out - relocate to first floor bedroom, adjacent to kitchen
some time after relocation - awaken sometime after 7am
it's a lather, rinse, repeat. i think it's a winner. i didn't want to cloud the agenda with too many details, however, there will be time for blogging. i don't want anyone to feel left out of my time off. i want you to feel left in.
because i'm still dedicated to dotting your lives with wisdom, here's a snap of the safety precautions that arrived alongside of my ddr dance pads. you guys be sure to avoid strong jump or shake because i worry about ya when we're not together.
Excellent. Excellent.
ReplyDeleteOk so what level do you play on??? Fave songs???
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry but I don't know anyone else my age that plays this and I SO want to have some for real we-are-NOT-dorks-cuz-you-said-so conversation about it.
I'm only good enough to do standard. Ok and on some of the crazy songs I go into convultions, swear quite a bit and finnaly just stand there and wait for it to tell me I'm a looser cuz it get's kinda hard. Well no, fuck kinda.
It's ok if you can do Heavy (btw why do they make the levels sound like tampon ratings??) I'll just keep on being lame and wonder how the fuck you do it.
you should come to cleveland and/or boulder. you will find people our age who are also obsessed with ddr. again, there is nothing wrong with us. we're ok for loving the same thing 9yr olds love.
ReplyDeletei was playing a lot of songs on light mode (total tampon rating) so i could unlock new songs and have switched to standard where i can kick one song's ass; 'my my my' (ddr extreme2). the rest are still eliciting many four letter words, causing me to throw in the towel way early, and then just standing there in disbelief as one hundered thousand arrows flutter by and laugh at me.
i got tumbled by it once.
ReplyDeletemy eyeball hurt for three day.
seven days makes a hole weak.
ReplyDeleteIf I tried this, regardless of what your instructions say, the damage would be virtually guaranteed.
ReplyDeleteI've only played once or twice, and children squealed with laughter and shamed me off the mat. If you guys think you are too old for it, then that's a definite for me!
ReplyDeleteTampon ratings? LOL Good call!
Awesome agenda. I am insanely jealous. I like how the DDR rules say to not put it near the fireplace yet you probably have it right next to the fireplace in your kitchen. Listen you don't have to play by their rules. I am very excited for the kitchen dance party. Let's do this.
ReplyDeleteLindystar, get your hor ass out to Cleveland. We will play some DDR followed up by some Karaoke Revolution all while drinking vodka. Also I will sing JoJo for you.
JV, now you HAVE to come play it.
To unlock more songs my friend J. and I looked up on the internet exactly which songs you have to get a certain rating on to win. One of them sounded WAY cool but we had to get like a C on Heavy mode on this hard ass song.
ReplyDeleteIn all of our brilliant-ness we decided that if we both stand on the pad and take two arrows, start the song and just run in place on our designated arrows as fast as we could that victory would be easily ours and we would collect our booty. Well fuck. Have you ever tried to run to run in place AS FAST AS YOU CAN for 4 minutes??? All the while watching the arrows STILL telling you to go to hell? Fuckers.
Next we tried using our hands, once agian both taking two arrows. Shit fire that was even worse. My bastard arms lasted about 30 seconds.
Oh well we did it again with our feet and finnaly got it and then the song that we won ended up sucking ball sack anyways but God damn it we won that bitch.
I'm 4 1/2 hours from Cleavland, I've got 3 DDR pads and a gerneal willingness to be drunk. Sounds like a plan.
Watching JV play that would be fun since he loves to dance so much. Count me in.
ReplyDeletenever in a million years.
ReplyDeleteworlds. are. colliding. lindy and JV (and petunia) are coming to cleveland for the purposes of ddr in all its glory. this is going to be crazy face.
ReplyDeleteDon't be a wuss JV there will be plenty of drinking and you will be among your kind.
ReplyDeleteJust ignore all of the digi. cameras. For real, don't worry I'm sure none of us would post pics.
Personally, I have never played DDR. I will continue to have never played DDR. This has nothing to do with the humiliation of, well, playing DDR, but rather the music. Pop music, particularely Japanese pop music, makes me itch.
ReplyDeleteI dunno about the whole DDR bit, but if there is vodka involved, I feel it only proper to attend.
ReplyDeleteSgt. is our kinda man.
ReplyDelete